How to handle it when change is inevitable

Woman in grey hate laughing under January grey skies.

Change is omnipresent…

From the child who matures and goes off to college to retiring and moving. We all change.

Day in. Day out.

I’ve written a lot about change. Often, in the form of a divorce as that’s a concrete, heartbreaking experience for many. But change, shifting, committing to breaking a habit, moving forward, letting go of things… is with us all of the time.

So what makes change feel so awful? Scary. Overwhelming. Confronting?

These days I look around and see change in all parts of my life. I’m struck by the amazing success of my clients and letting them go… I anticipate the empty nest as my youngest heads off to college… I’m considering a possible move from a city I love… there are family members confronting serious health issues… then the omnipresent extra few pounds I always struggle to release.

Change.

And since I don’t mince words or shy away from ugly tears and negative feelings, I’ve been up against my own stuff around change. I’m wrestling with exactly what you’re up against. Especially during the quiet moments of life. Those “you and you” moments.

And I keep asking, “How do I want to look back on this period in my life?” This is the question I think about because it’s at the heart of the moment.

No matter what any of us are up against, we have to ask “Who will we be when we meet our future self?”

Because if change is inevitable, it’s always up to us to decide and manage how we’re going to confront those changes.

I find this fascinating! I believe we can all rise above the base fears and insecurities and choose a way of moving forward, however slowly if necessary, with grace. Maybe not always with ease but with grace. And fortitude.

Lately, I’ve been working on teaching the 6-second shift. I’m excited by the idea that we can take on more than we believe. That we do so whether we realize it or not, and that we can get through our days with more grace and fortitude than we may have thought before. It’s a lesson I keep sharing with my clients and students.

I share this with you as you go about living and changing. “Who do you want to be as you confront the things you and your family are up against?” Do you have the support to get through it with grace? Are you strong enough to handle what comes you way?