How’s a single dad to handle unwanted parenting advice when guys know exactly how to take care of kids? Ahhhhh, the burden of catering to others’ needs when all you really want is to be with your kids! It’s bad enough that your ex-wife weighs in on your parenting. You also get parenting advice from complete strangers, or your friends, or even a new lover!
The more confidence you ooze while being with your kids, the more charming and charismatic you’ll be.
Including those women who want to give you advice. Ask yourself, “Are they really giving me advice or merely wanting to be around my manly competence with wrangling this diaper change on a park bench?” Confident men know how to parent and aren’t afraid to do so.
The more attention you give your kids instead of, you know, ignoring them, the less unwanted glares you’ll get from others.
When a single dad is supposed to be playing with his kids or overseeing their homework but is texting someone else, he opens himself up to parenting advice. Or if he’s supposed to be taking them out to dinner but is instead talking on his cell phone, other people say stuff. When he is talking on his cell phone or texting instead of paying attention, we give unwanted parenting advice.
This teaches your children that they’re not important. And we hate that. The biggest gift any one of us can give to another human being is the gift of generosity. If we, on the outside, see you, super dad, as being generous… not on the cell phone, not texting but talking and laughing and listening to your family and friends, there’s nothing to say!
Generosity looks like listening to others, really seeing another human being and being present when we’re with each other.
But you’re thinking, “My kids are on their phones all the time! They don’t want to talk to me.”
I find it tough sometimes to figure out what’s really going on inside my kids. Way too often, they simply ignore me. And that is a frustrating moment. But when the energy between a parent and a child is safe, a child is less likely to act out, ignore or jostle for attention. I work hard to pay attention to my children even so. When a child feels as if they’re the most important thing in their father’s eyes at that moment, hopefully, they will be able to relax and learn to trust.
We live in a hostile world. (At least to a little person.) Your role as a single dad is to provide safety and security to your offspring. Unfortunately, during a divorce, no one feels safe! So for those times, you’re with your children, let them be your everything. They will relish your attention and want to show up well to win your approval and appreciation. Fingers crossed…
There’s nothing more appealing than a beautiful man ignoring a beautiful woman and focusing on his kids.
But here’s the important thing to avoid parenting advice… we notice!) Especially women. It taps into all our primal attraction stuff. So, if you want a woman to notice you when you’re out, don’t flirt or make eye contact. Instead, focus on your kids. She will love it and figure out a way to give you her number.
So, basically, I’m using my kids to attract a woman? Yep, that’s what’s happening anyway so let’s stop fooling ourselves. And more importantly for this article, you’re avoiding unwanted parental advice!
There’s a balancing act that must be mastered while being a solo parent to avoid parenting advice.
How do you manage your responsibilities with good old fashioned family values? Especially when you don’t want to become a fanatic totally afraid to color outside the lines?
The rules are not black and white. There will be times you get on your phone having to deal with a crisis at work. Sometimes you can’t help but notice that woman over there. You may be drawn to speak with her, to get her phone number. It happens. You’re human! So how do you ride out those moments and return to homeostasis when that happens?
You put your attention back onto being a great parent. You simply disengage from this distracting person in a polite and civilized manner. I still think we on the outside LOVE seeing good old fashioned manners. We love it when you say things like, “It was great to meet you, but I’m here with my kids.” It’s nice to see people being polite. We will ooze praise and gush about what a great person you are and how lucky your kids are to have you as a dad! Seriously.
When we see someone else able to demonstrate undivided attention toward children, we’re inspired and in awe.
All of us admire the parent who puts their kids first. This is what we all wanted growing up. It’s what we all strive to do in our own lives. We don’t know how to do it without you showing us (which is why we criticize and give our opinion). It’s that important and on a deep level, you know it too.
By following these steps basically, you win! You will win the hearts and minds of everyone with whom you come into contact. If you learn these few, simple ways to handle unwanted parenting advice, you and your children will grow closer, more trusting and loving toward one another. No one will have to say anything but good things about you, and you won’t have to defend yourself. It’s that simple. Doesn’t that feel good? You can let down your guard now.